Four
Steps to Healing an Overwhelming Experience
The
tragic events of 9/11 instilled in most of us a deep sense
of pain, anger, and helplessness, which are the typical
symptoms associated with trauma. Whether directly involved
in any such event or simply witnessing it, as many of us
did over and over again through the media representation,
our emotions and our nervous system can become overwhelmed.
When this happens, we can become so fixated on these images
and feelings we become blocked in our healing and recovery
from such traumatic events.
These are suggestions that I offered shortly following 9/11,
yet can be helpful whenever an individual, family or community
experiences mild or massive trauma, no matter what the nature
of that trauma. Although acting on these suggestions will
no doubt be extremely helpful, in some instances the individual
may require a more intensive approach. In these instances
it’s best to seek out psychological and/or medical
treatment as well as implementing these ideas.
1)
COMMUNITY
DON’T ISOLATE! Stay in touch with others who will
support you and whom you can support. This can be time with
friends or formally organized groups, e.g. churches, twelve
step meetings, support groups, etc.
CARING AND SHARING! Show others your caring through words
and action. Giving love is rewarding for both giver and
receiver. Let yourself receive care as well, and ask for
it as needed. A hand on the shoulder or a good hug from
a friend or family is worth a thousand words.
PRAY TOGETHER! Pray for peace, compassion and wisdom, and
for the forces of light and peace to prevail.
2)
RESOURCES
FOCUS ON RESOURCES! It’s critical to healing to weave
resources in with the dramatic tensions triggered by overwhelming
events, aka trauma. Resources can be anything that helps
you feel good, to feel relaxed and calmer. Activities such
as watching movies, gardening, cooking, taking walks in
nature, exercise, etc., can all be resources.
DISTRACT YOURSELF! Yes, it’s not only okay to escape,
but necessary and useful for healing. This can be anything
that takes your mind off the images, thoughts, sounds, etc.
of the traumatic incident.
3)
RESPOND
DISCHARGE AND RELEASE! Physiologically, when your nervous
system is over-stimulated, it balances itself through discharge
and release. Experiences such as trembling, shaking, sweating,
a surge of warmth, stomach gurgling, deep breathing or sighing,
crying or laughing are all ways the body is bringing itself
back into balance. These will come and go, so give them
time to do discharge. Be sure to allow yourself respite
from these by alternating the discharge with resourcing.
TELL YOUR STORY! But don’t dwell on it or repeat
it again and again. Take breaks frequently, and refocus
on here and now. Give yourself opportunities to express
your feelings, and also CHANNEL YOUR FEELINGS INTO CONSTRUCTIVE
ACTION!
4)
GROUNDING AND ORIENTING
LOOK AROUND! Focus your attention on items in your immediate
surroundings. Really study something that attracts your
attention. Focus in the here and now.
NOTICE THE GROUND! Take a walk or sit outside, and especially
note the sensation of your feet or any other part of your
body on the earth. Walk slow and mindfully. Stomp your feet
a few times, then notice the soles of your feet.
TOUCH! Hug your friends and family. Ask for shoulder rubs,
and offer them to others. Get a massage. Make love.
EXERCISE! A very good way to discharge your tension, plus
it helps your body in so many other ways. Sports, aerobic
activities, yoga, weight training. Any and all can be helpful
to maintaining balance.
