I recall when I was in my early twenties, I was having
dinner with my family and my nephew Danny, who was 14, had
joined us. My father had just given a bit of grandfatherly
advice to Danny, then quickly followed by saying, “But it
probably doesn’t matter what I say.” Not in a way of trying
to get reassurance from any of us at the table, but a
sincere comment that betrayed how he thought about himself,
that who he was had no impact on others.
I realized at that very moment that my father never
thought he mattered or had any effect on his world,
particularly with those whom he loved and loved him. I
stopped in the middle of eating, looked at him and caught
his eye. Although I had never expressed anything strongly to
him in his entire life, I stated emphatically, “Yes it does!
Don’t put yourself down that way. What you have to say to
Dan really matters a great deal!”
Neither of us said much for a few moments, still
looking, not staring, at one another, my father in a mild
pause of surprise as if he was allowing the power of what I
said to penetrate somewhere behind his more common wall of
self-effacing invisibility. Something else passed between us
at that moment. We both realized without saying that I was
also talking about his influence with me. Inside I felt some
sadness that this man I called my father would think so
little of himself as to not see how important he was to me.
I only wished he had taken a stronger role with me, advised
me more, talked with me more, but he was a man that didn’t
express himself a lot, like many men of his generation.
It took me many years before I could fully accept
that I do in fact affect my world, in ways I’m aware of and
in ways that I’m not. Whatever actions I take, there can be
ripple effects, consequences that I may never hear about.
When I pray, do shamanic healing, energy work, write books,
create oracle cards, donate time or money to causes I
believe in, I may never know exactly how these affect my
world, except in those instances when there’s direct
feedback.
We all settle for what we have from time to time, yet
often there’s a mysterious force inside us that wants
challenge, wants to grow. When we look around us and see
those things in our life and in our world that are
dissatisfying in some way, we have a choice doing nothing or
of taking some sort of action. Seeing trash in the park or
on the beach, you can ignore it, judge it, hope that “they”
do something about it, or simply start picking up trash! We
often underestimate the impact that such kind and
compassionate acts may have.
With all that’s going on in the world, many people
experience something we can call compassion fatigue. This is
when you shut down and feel helpless because there’s so much
darkness in the world. There are three things you can do
when this happens. First, narrow your choices. Choose a
cause that’s near and dear to your heart, and do what you
can do. Second, change your thoughts. Why dwell on the
darkness and misery and suffering? By doing so, in a way
you’re actually contributing to it by bringing yourself down
along with that part of the world. Sure there’s suffering,
but you can take some sort of action and still not join in
the suffering.
Third, act locally, such as the example of picking up
the trash. There’s an organization here in Orange County
called Surfriders that periodically sponsors a beach clean
up. Another local church sponsors a clothing drive for the
homeless and the needy. Next time a homeless person asks you
for money, buy them a meal instead. The possibilities are
endless!
What I aim for is to live in such a way that my will
is congruent with Spirit’s will for me, and then set my
intention and actions accordingly. It’s not always easy to
hear the voice of Spirit, but with practice it becomes an
exquisite dictum for the art of living. As Thich Nhat Hahn
said, “The real miracle isn’t to walk on water, but to walk
on the earth.”
Dr. Steven D. Farmer
is the author of the best-selling
Animal Spirit Guides,
the Power Animal
Oracle Cards,
Power Animals,
Sacred Ceremony,
Adult Children of Abusive Parents, and the newly
released guided meditation CD,
Messages from Your
Animal Spirit Guides. He’s also host of his own radio
show, The Shamanic
Hotline on HayHouseRadio.com. Dr. Farmer is a
shamanic practitioner, ordained minister, and former
psychotherapist.
He makes his home in Laguna Beach, California and Hawaii
with his wife, Doreen Virtue.
For further information, go to www.PowerAnimals.com